A Story Idea Each Day for a Month — Day 20
This is the seventh year in a row I’ve run this series in April.
Today’s story: A parent’s guide to dropping your kid off at college.
As recently as 20 years ago, most parents would have dropped their newly minted freshman off at the curb outside the dorm and waved “goodbye.” (My parents gave me a hug and a bus ticket.) Today’s parents, however, seem compelled to immerse themselves in the whole new-to-college experience, even down to stage-managing their kid’s move-in and class registration down to the last detail.
Over the past 30 years, due to fears over both safety and what it takes to succeed in our society, we’ve seen a steady encroachment of parents into domains previously inhabited by children — play, organized activities, homework, school. Parents who have sidled right alongside their kid through the challenges of middle and high school have a hard time pulling back when it’s time for college. This is why, in the late ’90s, we began seeing parents come to campus expecting to have a role to play in college life. From the outside it looks absurd when, say, a mom or dad asks questions about research opportunities or about how the course registration process works, but from that parent’s vantage point, it’s just a continuation of what they’ve always done to further their child’s protection and success. The trouble is, if the child (now an adult) never does the question-asking (or problem solving, or choice-making, or investigating) for him or herself, he or she never learns. That child becomes a chronological adult who’s rather incapable of handling things on his or her own.
Has someone already done this movie? I must have missed it because this is freaking no-brainer. Here’s my take. Meet Hayley. She’s a bright, well-grounded, and positive-minded 18 year-old. She lives with her mother Robin, divorced for 5 years from Dana. Dana has been an active presence in Hayley’s life and the parents have been super intentional in setting aside their interpersonal issues in order to be ‘present’ for their daughter’s upbringing. It’s all been about providing support for Hayley. One problem: All of the underlying dynamics which led to the divorce in the first place have been subjugated and sublimated by their commitment to being Uber-Parents.
Tomorrow Hayley heads off to Yale. This marks the end of Robin and Dana’s day-to-day direct involvement with their daughter as parents. Which means their fundamental point of reference for how to act and interact is going away. Which means these two adults will have no goddammed clue how to function without the their daily parental responsibility.
The story takes place over 48 hours, the preparation for, traveling to, and settling in of Hayley at college. And whereas Hayley is well-prepared for this transition, the parents aren’t.
For example, Robin assumed she would be the one to drive Hayley to school and drop her off. That doesn’t wash with Dana who insists on being the one. Argument numero uno. So they both drive Hayley to school. In separate cars. That’s right, Hayley spend exactly one hour with mom… switches cars… then one hour with dad.
Then who’s going to prove to be the most caring, thoughtful, and helpful parent in the moving in process. Robin and Dana try desperately to outdo each other, maxing out credit cards buying shit for Hayley she doesn’t need or want.
But the worst thing is this: Neither parent can say goodbye. And it’s not so much about Hayley, it’s more about trying to demonstrate which parent loves their daughter more. Who’s going to blink and leave first? If you do, you just proved you’re a shitty parent!
Hijinks and mayhem ensue.
There you go: My twentieth story idea for the month. And it’s yours. Free!
What would you do with it?
Each day this month, I invite you to join me in comments to do some brainstorming. Gender bend, genre bend, what if. Take each day’s story idea and see what it can become when we play around with it. These are all valuable skills for a writer to develop.
See you in comments (hit Reply to join the conversation). And come back tomorrow for another Story Idea Each Day For A Month.