Daily Dialogue — August 31, 2014

Dean Wormer: Where are the other two? Stratton and Schoenstein?
Hoover: We looked everywhere, sir, but…
Dean Wormer: Never mind. It doesn’t matter. You gentlemen seen your midterm grades yet?
Hoover: They’re not posted yet, sir.
Dean Wormer: I’ve seen them. Mr. Kroger… [consults grades sheet] Two C’s, two D’s, and an F. That’s a one point two grade average. Congratulations, Kroger. You’re at the top of the Delta pledge class.

Kroger glances at Blutarsky who nods his head as if to say “good job.”

Dean Wormer: Mr. Dorfman.
Dorfman: Hello.
Dean Wormer: Zero point two. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

Dorfman face goes pale.

Dean Wormer: Mr. Hoover. President of Delta house… four C’s and an F. A fine example you set.

Hoover chagrined.

Dean Wormer: Daniel Simpson Day… has no grade point average. All courses incomplete.

Day… no reaction.

Dean Wormer: Mr. Blutarsky.

Startled by Blutarsky who has pencils sticking out of his nose.

Dean Wormer: Zero point zero.

Blutarsky makes a face.

Dean Wormer: Now I want you to tell Mr. Stratton and Mr. Schoenstein exactly what I’m about to tell you.
Hoover: What, sir?
Dean Wormer: You’re out! Finished at Faber! Expelled! I want you off this campus Monday morning! And I’m sure you’ll be happy to know… that l have notified your local draft boards… and told them that you are now all… eligible for military service.

— Animal House (1978), written by Harold Ramis & Douglas Kenney & Chris Miller

The Daily Dialogue theme for the week: Delivering Bad News.

Trivia: Originally, Harold Ramis and Doug Kenney’s idea was titled “Laser Orgy Girls”, a comedy about Charles Manson as a high school student. Producer Matty Simmons suggested that the setting be changed to college and the content to be toned down. Ramis also incorporated ideas from an earlier treatment he wrote titled “Freshman Year” based on his experiences in college.

Dialogue On Dialogue: This bad news directly precedes Blutarsky’s famous “when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor” speech. Oh, what the hell. Here it is.