Daily Dialogue — July 22, 2014

Andrew Martin: May one, sir? Is now a good time?
‘Ma’am’ Martin: What? A good time for what?
Andrew Martin: Last night, Sir taught…
Sir: No, no, no, don’t blame me Andrew. Just… go ahead.
Andrew Martin: Thank you sir
Andrew Martin: [Very fast] Two cannibals were eating a clown. One turns to the other and says “Does this taste funny to you?” How do you make a hanky dance? Put a little boogie in it! What is a brunette between two blondes? A translator! Do you know why blind people don’t like to sky-dive? It scares their dogs! A man with demensia is driving on the freeway. His wife calls him on the mobile phone and says “Sweetheart, I heard there’s someone driving the wrong way on the freeway.” He says “One? There’s hundreds!” What’s silent and smells like worms? Bird farts. It must have been an engineer who designed the human body. Who else would put a waste processing plant next to a recreation area? A woman goes into a doctor’s office, and the doctor says “Do you mind if I numb your breasts?” “Not at all.” *makes ‘motor-boating’ noise. “Num-num-num-num.”
Andrew Martin: [Family chuckles] One did it sir!
Sir: Andrew, it was fine, but we might want to talk about appropriateness and um, and timing.
Andrew Martin: It’s ten-fifteen sir.

— Bicentennial Man (1999), screenplay by Nicholas Kazan, novel by Isaac Asimov and Robert Silverberg

The Daily Dialogue theme for the week: Robot. Today’s suggestion by blknwite.

Trivia: Andrew is a NDR-114. This may be a tribute to Stanley Kubrick, who used the number 114 in multiple films such as A Clockwork Orange (1971) and Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964).

Dialogue On Dialogue: Commentary by blknwite: “I know its pure cheese but I love it. Also love this quote on IMDB, Nicolas Kazan: ‘The next time someone reads your script and either really hates something that you know works, or makes cavalier and foolish suggestions — perhaps you should ask them ‘Did you ever hear a song for the first time and hate it and then, two weeks later, find yourself singing it?’”

If you have any suggestions for this week’s theme, please post in comments.

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