Hollywood Tales

“The rejections piled up, hundreds of them. I’d write things and think something was going to happen, and it almost would. I almost got hired on sitcoms, and then I almost got hired here, almost got hired there, almost got hired everywhere. I remember pitching to ‘The Red Shoe Diaries’, the erotic series on ‘Showtime,’ and sitting across from Zalman King’s partner. He had my ‘Simpsons’ script and my ‘Iowa Review’ short story and my ‘Underachievers’ screenplay, and he looked at them as if they were a pile of feces — -which they were, except for the short story. He said, ‘You look like a clever boy, but what do you know about love?’ And I said, ‘I don’t know anything about love. But I know I can get Joan Severance naked inside of two minutes and the story will make sense.’ And he looked at me and let out this very slow laugh — -’Ha…ha…ha.’ I also got rejected from ‘Baywatch Nights’ over the telephone. Those are just a few examples. It happened hundreds of times. Believe me, if I’d had any idea how it worked, I would have quit, I’m sure. My best friend was ignorance. Don’t underestimate its importance.”

 — Stephen Gaghan (Traffic, Syriana)

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