Reader Question: What about showing a character’s emotions in action description?
Maurice Vaughan asks:
Scott, what’s your best advice on showing emotions in action description when writing a script? At times I find it hard to express what I’m trying the character to feel in the descriptions.
Thanks.
Setting aside dialogue in which a character may convey their emotions through their words, writers have two main avenues open to us: character’s actions and describing the mood of the moment.
Since movies are primarily a visual medium, the wisest course of action in most cases is to have your characters express their emotions through actions. Some actions are pretty self-explanatory. If a character slams their fist into a wall, there’s a pretty good chance they are expressing anger. However some actions can have different emotional meanings depending upon the context. For example, let’s consider the simple act of a hug:
Scenario 1: Bob and Lisa are a young couple, and they’ve just ending a huge argument. A moment’s silence, then he reaches out to her. She moves to him. They hug. We can probably interpret that at least on one level, they are acknowledging they still care about each other despite their argument.
Scenario 2: Lisa is a psychotic killer who has cornered Bob in a basement. Wielding a gun, she edges toward Bob, then pulls him into a hug, pressing the gun against his stomach. Here the hug could have a number of emotional meanings, hopefully if this is a thriller some scary ones.
Scenario 3: Bob is at work downloading information on a rival’s computer when Lisa, the rival’s assistant, surprises him by entering the office. Bob leaps up and envelopes her in a big hug, surprising her with a sudden confession of undying love, meanwhile pivoting her away from his monitor screen. Yet another meaning for the same action.
So one way to convey a character’s emotions: through actions.
The other way is what I call psychological writing, where you in effect comment on the mood of the moment. This happens in novels and short stories al the time, but a screenplay is largely an externalized reality, by and large we can only know what a character is thinking or feeling through their dialogue or actions. However there are times when what is best is for the writer to use scene description to paint a sense of the emotional state of the scene.
Here is one such example from the screenplay American Beauty, written by Alan Ball:
INT. BURNHAM HOUSE — FAMILY ROOM — CONTINUOUS
Lester starts unbuttoning Angela’s blouse. She seems
disconnected from what’s happening. Lester pulls her blouse
open, exposing her breasts.
Lester looks down at her, grinning, unable to believe he’s
actually about to do what he’s dreamed of so many times, and
then…
ANGELA
This is my first time.
Lester LAUGHS.
LESTER
You’re kidding.
ANGELA
(a whisper)
I’m sorry.
A beat. Lester looks down at her, his grin fading.
His POV: Angela lies beneath us, embarrassed and vulnerable.
This is not the mythically carnal creature of Lester’s fantasies;
this is a nervous child.
ANGELA (cont’d)
I still want to do it… I just thought
I should tell you… in case you
wondered why I wasn’t… better.
Lester’s face falls. There’s no way he’s going to go through
with this now.
Those three italicized descriptions are examples of psychological writing, commenting on the emotional tenor of the moment by going ‘inside’ Lester to express what he’s feeling and thinking.
Evidently there are some screenwriting teachers / gurus who say that you’re not supposed to do this sort of thing, you can only describe what a moviegoer can see on screen, not go into the internal world of a story universe. And yet here is just one of many examples in an Academy Award winning screenplay in which the screenwriter does precisely that.
My advice?
(1) You can take advantage of psychological writing, but sparingly. As noted, a screenplay is not a novel, you have to respect the fact it exists fundamentally as an externalized reality.
(2) Pick moments where it is critical to sell the mood to the reader and can’t be done better through a character’s actions or dialogue.
(3) Make sure the emotions you are describing are honest and real.
(4) Use vivid descriptors to really drive home the point you want to make.
If you are unclear what emotions are emerging in the moment, I recommend you drill down deeper into the scene and your characters to clarify precisely who is feeling what.
Hope you find that helpful. And as usual, if anyone has something to add, please do so in comments.
Monday’s question: Structure is character. Agree or disagree?